Monday, March 8, 2010

Dear Drunk Guy I Didn't Have Sex With On Saturday...

You're kind of cool.  I enjoy making out with you.  But there are a few reasons why I'm glad we didn't do the nasty.

a.  you never texted me back a couple of weekends ago.
b.  you have some of the symptoms of an only child
c.   last Sunday I saw a barrette (not mine) on your window sill.

signs of hope.

a.  you danced to James Brown in your living room at 2 AM...that was one of the coolest things i've ever seen.
b.  you sobered up pretty quickly
c.  you don't snore.

maybe next time.

Also, Dear friend-of-a-friend who was hitting on me at the bar on Saturday.  Don't worry, you weren't to forward.  In fact, I had no idea you were gaming on me.  So...welcome to friend zone.

Also random-guy-in-the-gray-hoodie who I ran away from by accident.  Sorry about that, but you were boring and it was awkward and I on reflection I think I did us both a solid.

Also Hatian-cab driver,  I'm sorry I was too drunk to properly close your door and that I that brought drunk-guy-i-didn't have sex with on saturday into your cab.  I'm glad he didn't vom.

thank you all for your interesting vignettes.

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